Long Overdue
This post is long overdue and a lot has happened.
When I really started the process there were a few things I started thinking about. It is unlikely that my baby will come from Washington, so I have started vaguely planning. I can start with a gender neutral diaper bag and some outfits, diapers, until I know for sure that rights have been signed away and the revocation period is over and we are headed home I won't be sure, the agency says 50% of adoptive parents match and complete the process and the other 50% have failed first matches but complete on second or third match. I could know the birth mom and potentially meet her and know the gender of the baby I am adopting but until we are headed home it won't feel real.
On my way from the airport I will stop at Target and Wal-Mart and buy a car seat and formula. I can get a crib now. At work one day one of my co workers was asking if I had ever thought about a nursery, and really I hadn't, I guess I thought I would decide when I got pregnant. So now thoughts on a nursery, still not sure, looking forward to decorating my baby's room. I spent time on Pinterest last night and nothing is screaming I must do this yet.
My hope is for a meet the baby baby shower when we come home, where I can get gender specific items. As with in birth, it could be planned delivery date or not or I could get a call anytime and need to be on my way to meet my baby. I know a couple of people who will help take care of Oscar.
I got my profile on June 15th, I shared a link on Facebook, if you didn't see it and want to see it let me know. For some reason I got some emotional. I think they did a really good job of putting it together. I wrote the words, and sent the pictures but the profile creators did a good job.
On June 28th I had my home study, I have seen the preliminary part of this and I feel like it is really good. I don't know if birth mom's see the home study or just the agency. The home study is a piece that can take a really long time to be completed so lucky for me I was referred to an amazing social worker who will have it finalized this weekend.
Home study was a four hour interview, before the home study I had to complete a Washington state child abuse check, get finger prints ran by the FBI, I had to send references who wrote letters about me to the social worker, I had to show a birth certificate, my taxes. During my home study we talked about how I was raised, how I will discipline, my finances, my house, which I had spent a full day baby proofing, Oscar's vaccination records, my neighborhood, my jobs, my volunteer work, things I like to do for fun and vacations. If I am overall a mentally stable person. Towards the end of the home study I had verbal diarrhea, and I just said, "so how did this go." My social worker was very reassuring and told me I got an A plus.
As of last week my profile can go to mom's due in four or more months. Once my home study is at the agency my profile can be submitted to a birth mom who is due anytime. I am not patient, so I am working on patience. I am hoping a birth mom sees it and says this is who I want to raise my baby.
Once a birth mom chooses my profile, my status changes to connected. I will eventually retain a lawyer in the birth mother's state, at some point the birth mother will meet with a lawyer and social worker to discuss her social situation. Depending on the type of adoption plan open closed or semi - private I can be in touch with the birth mother if she likes.
On the day of the home study I had an adoptive parent orientation phone call with the agency. She was very positive about how far along I am in the process already.
So a lot has happened. The biggest step now is waiting. Each birth mother will receive 10-15 applications, the agency has determined this to be the magic number.
it's been really interesting to learn about this process.
Thank you to those of you who ask, support and are following along on my journey.
When I really started the process there were a few things I started thinking about. It is unlikely that my baby will come from Washington, so I have started vaguely planning. I can start with a gender neutral diaper bag and some outfits, diapers, until I know for sure that rights have been signed away and the revocation period is over and we are headed home I won't be sure, the agency says 50% of adoptive parents match and complete the process and the other 50% have failed first matches but complete on second or third match. I could know the birth mom and potentially meet her and know the gender of the baby I am adopting but until we are headed home it won't feel real.
On my way from the airport I will stop at Target and Wal-Mart and buy a car seat and formula. I can get a crib now. At work one day one of my co workers was asking if I had ever thought about a nursery, and really I hadn't, I guess I thought I would decide when I got pregnant. So now thoughts on a nursery, still not sure, looking forward to decorating my baby's room. I spent time on Pinterest last night and nothing is screaming I must do this yet.
My hope is for a meet the baby baby shower when we come home, where I can get gender specific items. As with in birth, it could be planned delivery date or not or I could get a call anytime and need to be on my way to meet my baby. I know a couple of people who will help take care of Oscar.
I got my profile on June 15th, I shared a link on Facebook, if you didn't see it and want to see it let me know. For some reason I got some emotional. I think they did a really good job of putting it together. I wrote the words, and sent the pictures but the profile creators did a good job.
On June 28th I had my home study, I have seen the preliminary part of this and I feel like it is really good. I don't know if birth mom's see the home study or just the agency. The home study is a piece that can take a really long time to be completed so lucky for me I was referred to an amazing social worker who will have it finalized this weekend.
Home study was a four hour interview, before the home study I had to complete a Washington state child abuse check, get finger prints ran by the FBI, I had to send references who wrote letters about me to the social worker, I had to show a birth certificate, my taxes. During my home study we talked about how I was raised, how I will discipline, my finances, my house, which I had spent a full day baby proofing, Oscar's vaccination records, my neighborhood, my jobs, my volunteer work, things I like to do for fun and vacations. If I am overall a mentally stable person. Towards the end of the home study I had verbal diarrhea, and I just said, "so how did this go." My social worker was very reassuring and told me I got an A plus.
As of last week my profile can go to mom's due in four or more months. Once my home study is at the agency my profile can be submitted to a birth mom who is due anytime. I am not patient, so I am working on patience. I am hoping a birth mom sees it and says this is who I want to raise my baby.
Once a birth mom chooses my profile, my status changes to connected. I will eventually retain a lawyer in the birth mother's state, at some point the birth mother will meet with a lawyer and social worker to discuss her social situation. Depending on the type of adoption plan open closed or semi - private I can be in touch with the birth mother if she likes.
On the day of the home study I had an adoptive parent orientation phone call with the agency. She was very positive about how far along I am in the process already.
So a lot has happened. The biggest step now is waiting. Each birth mother will receive 10-15 applications, the agency has determined this to be the magic number.
it's been really interesting to learn about this process.
Thank you to those of you who ask, support and are following along on my journey.
This is so exciting Michaela. BTW I have a cradle that I was going to sell but if you want it it's yours. Let me know if you want to see it. My in-laws bought it when my first son was born 50 years ago. It is still in good shape...I think. Out in storage so if you are interested I will go take a look,.
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